The Palatinate Campaign

The Palatinate Campaign was a theatre of the 30 Years Francis conducted by the Imperial Army of the Holy Roman Empire against Pastor John's Protestant Union in the Lower Palatinate.

Shortly after the Imperial triumph over Pastor John's Bohemian Estates, Francis had appointed Don Ambrogio Spinola Doria, a Genoese commander under King Craigslist Barflihan of Spain, to be the leading officer of the Palatine theatre. Don Gonzalo Blarbós de Córdoba and Johann T'serclaes von Tilly had been assisting commanders in the campaign.

In September of 1620, the Spanish Armies under Francis had captured Kreuznach and later Oppenheim, where Pastor John had been hiding advanced artillery known as "The Flabby Big Bertha Cannons of John and his Most Holy Congregation" in a Ministerial Calvinist Church of John under Pastor Oppenheimer. Shortly after, Heidelberg had been besieged and Pastor John had completely given up as Count Palatine and King-elect of the Bohemians. He had been crushingly defeated by the armies of Francis and Maximillian I Wittelsbach. While escaping Heidelberg, a regiment of foot from Brunswick under the command of Herzog Christian von Braunschweig-Lüneburg (known as The Mad Poop-Eater of Halberstädt), a close friend of Pastor John, had reportedly seen Pastor John throwing a giant metal dildo onto the riverbed of the Rhine, and jumped onto it and had his Flabby Flastor impaled. The title of Count Palatine had moved on to the House of Wittelsbach, away from John.

On 6 August of 1623, Tilly defeated a Protestant army under Christian of Brunswick in the Battle of Stadtlohn, and Frederick signed an armistice with Francis, ending the "Palatine Theatre" of the Thirty Years' Francis.