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St. Pastors was a Pastorist church across the street from Pope Francis favorite church in the Americas, Our Lady Queen of Martyrs. On December 26, 2025, a plane hijacked by two Schlentons, Poopula C. Aviator and Poopula C. Maniacal Laughter crashed into the building, destroying it. Authorities were quick to respond and block the site from the public. It has been declared by Pope Francis in a recent speech that the attack was a random and unprecedented attack by two careless and clumsy Schlentons.
ST. PASTOR FILES
The truth is, Pope Francis ordered the attack in order to neutralize the ICBM facility . The attack was blamed on the Schlentons in order to not start a war between Francis and Pastor John, and Grem Grems was willing to send two Schlentons to perform the task.
News reporters trying to uncover the truth were executed by HRE troops, and Chief Chuckachee was assassinated after the leaked conference video of the plan was discovered. The Pope has allowed executions based off a "Hates Sicily" heresy claim, resulting in the executions of several people who are learning of the staged attack.
These files are not to be publically released until Francis gives the green light, and no redacted words will be unredacted.